After a tumultuous 10 months I have found that there is a massive different between creatively thinking through a problem and analysing a problem. After all I have been a programmer for 20 years.
I used to think I was an analyst who took in all the information, calculated the outcomes and came to an educated conclusion. “Used to” is the operative phrase here.
After almost working myself into an early grave, quite literally, I found myself on a cocktail of modern drugs that removed a lot of my massive highs and deep lows so I could maintain an even keel. It took 7 months of experimentation and countless dark times before a psychiatrist prescribed something known as “Californian Rocket Fuel”. Eureka!! I felt 90% myself again, with one glaring difference. My emotion that used to drive my creativity was flattened. This “flatness” has shown me how much I had been using this emotion to think creatively and solve problems.
I WAS a creative thinker, NOW I am an analytical thinker.
I can now see the chasm, the great divide, between both streams. Where I would get flustered in the face of too much information previously I can now sit calmly with all the information and truly come to an informed decision.